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That first time … is it really that important?

Category:
For Girls
Author:
Regan McCully-Barker
Posted:
Tuesday, 8 July 2008
That first time … is it really that important?

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As embarrassing as this sounds, the other day I was watching one of those American television series based on the clichéd overemotional and hyper active sex lives of teenagers.

There is an endless list of these teen drama’s from the Dawson’s Creeks to the Degrassi High’s, however the story is still the same and no, it is not the shame in knowing or viewing these type of shows.

All of these poor excuses for entertainment depict or hold the basic idea that the girls want to make sure they are losing their cherished virginity to someone who truly loves them and well, a boy want to get his ‘thing’ wet. Whether an adolescent female finds the right guy or not, there is a histrionic significance placed on the pressures of making the right choices when loosing ones virginity.

Obviously, when entering the lesbian world, there are many differences and alternative things that come into play. By now your thinking one of two things… either you’re the emotional type who is thinking of the hardships, or you’re a dirty minded person that’s thinking along the line of toys.

Now for this instance it can include both but does society place as much strain on lesbians as they do for those hetro girls? It’s not necessary in regards to the medical definition of virginity, but the act in itself.

Now ladies, we aren’t going to go all American Pie and deciding to make some sort if virginal lesbian pact to have sex within a certain time limit with funny and entertaining awkward moments along the way. In all honesty, looking back I had the experience before I even came out.

Yes it was full of anxiety and nervousness however it did lack those core beliefs and pressures about saving ones self until they are in love.

It can all be explained in three small words - it just happened. No planning, no considerations or even how I felt about the other person. It just happened.

I think many of us go through these experiences to learn more about ourselves rather than whom we are actually sleeping with.

In a lesbian world, virginity isn’t necessarily about losing it or even to the right person. It is more a focus on that endorsement of information or acknowledgement of this is who you are and accepting that you are gay whether it’s good the first time or not.

Plus, whether you had feelings originally or not…. By the end of it you will most likely want to have a commitment ceremony in Byron Bay. After all, I don’t think lesbians put much pressure on the initial act but more so the emotional consequences.

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2 Comments on “That first time … is it really that important?”

  1. Liz said,

    wow, that is so true!!

  2. Juls said,

    Love ya work………..

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