Caustic US comedian (and devout friend of the gays) Chelsea Handler opens her latest tome with a chapter devoted to when, aged nine, she first discovered masturbation. Lil’ Chelsea didn’t let up for a full year, often rubbing one out under the kitchen table with a wooden spoon while her family ate dinner. There’s plenty more to shock and delight in this hilarious collection, including one particularly memorable chapter about two muscle-bound LA Bears and their pride and joy, Dudley the bulldog.

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