Put success on the menu
The etiquette of attending or hosting a dinner party is fraught with danger and caution.
To save yourself any embarrassment and possible social alienation at your dinner party, peruse the info below and adopt at your will.
If one was to host the perfect dinner party, one would need the magical ability of Samantha Stephens from Bewitched. There are all manner of guides about, but always the basics are similar. The GLBTIQ dinner party is no different, really …
1. When it comes to invitations, a text or email will suffice in this decade, or simply a verbal invite. If you really want to go crazy, handwrite something interesting and get it in the post, although manners no longer require handwritten invites.
2. Greet your guests, or have your partner/ friend/ mum do so whilst you are perfecting the sauce for the lobster thermidor or unpacking the chicken pieces from the KFC bucket.
3. Graciously accept the offering of wine/ beer/ gin from your guest, making sure you promise to serve it if it is good or, if it is crap, serve it immediately.
4. Hors d’oeuvres are always appropriate and these can be as simple as a Jatz cracker with a slice of tomato and a lump of Coon cheese, or something more exotic such as buckwheat blini with smoked salmon, crème fraîche and some salmon roe. It depends on the guests which of these options you choose. They also help to suck up some of the cheap booze you have chosen to serve.
5. When eventually inviting guests to the table (after you have extinguished the burning pig in your oven or you have the quail boned and perfectly crisp on a soft polenta base) it’s wise not to shout “grub’s up”. It is also important that everything is ready for both entrée and main courses. If you are simply serving one course, make sure the Coon is grated for the spag bol.
6. Cheese is a great cheats’ way of doing dessert. Chances are you are going to be too pissed to flambé a crêpe suzette or else you are looking after your guests’ waistlines and planning to shake your butt under a mirror ball for the rest of the night.
From bnews, www.bnews.net.au.
