The name game
What is it about Australian Idol contestants and gay porn? First there was Casey Donovan, whose gay porn alter-ego (the sadly dead bareback star Casey Donovan) became retro-famous after a corporate sponsor misprinted a web address in an ad campaign. Sending thousands (or at least a few) teenage Casey fans to a semi-explicit gay porn website.
Now there’s another Australian Idol finalist to play the gay porn name game with.
Strangely, it’s not the one of the more obvious ones. I mean, this year’s finalists include guys called James Steele, Brendon Boney and Dean Geyer -“ which would all make reasonable fake names for any budding gay porn stars out there. It’s not the least obvious one either. I don’t think there’s a dude in the world hot enough to live down the name Guy Mutton.
No, this year’s Idol-name provider of Star office chuckles is Bobby Flynn, the unfortunate-looking Brisbane waiter with ridiculous hair but a pretty voice, whom my friends and I have dismissed with this sniff: He’s too talented to win.
Thing is, our Bobby has a namesake too, unveiled by the wags at spinstartshere.com, a namesake who can easily be found on a very popular image search site, with a similar curly mop of hair, who appears to be a dirty top.
It’s definitely not him. Hear that, Australian Idol lawyers? Definitely. Not. Him. Not even as a joke. Not him.
Gets you thinking, though. Perhaps there’s a minor gay porn star to match most vaguely hot-sounding names. Since naming my son, I’ve realised there’s a quite prominent one in Sydney with the same name, and can I please use this column to offer my official thanks to those gay friends who have gleefully alerted me to this fact.
For as much as I love gays and everything, that wasn’t my first priority. And turns out it could have been quite easily avoided. A quick search of the unofficial list of gay porn stars on wikipedia.org -“ seriously, is there anything that site doesn’t have? -“ is quite revealing. In the many hundreds of actors listed, most of them seem to be called something like Scott, Richard or Mark. So as long as I avoid those, my next child’s future on Australian Idol should be fine. At least as far as image searches go.
