Intersex and homophobia
With IDAHO on May 17, it is pertinent to remember why intersex is a part of the LGBTIQ alliance. Intersex people generally have a sexual orientation, however, it is more likely to be perceived as heterosexual than same-sex. We also have a gender identity, however, that almost always appears to conform to typically man or woman than gender non-conforming.
There is a notion held by some that intersex is associated with gender non-conforming and some kind of transitioning. This is rarely true of nearly all intersex. Sex transitioning with respect to intersex is meaningless. Our sex preferences are as diverse as those of non-intersex people.
How did intersex come to be allied to others who are a part of LGBTQ activism and community? Homophobia is the simple answer. Although people with physical differences are often subjected to prejudice because of those differences, for intersex there is more to it. Intersex researchers have noted the most common concern for parents when told their child is intersex is that it means their child is gay. Intersex surgery on infants addresses those parental fears by modifying anatomies so children will become men or women in heterosexual relationships.
Many intersex, on learning of their differences as adults, are rejected by their partners because of homophobic notions that their partner is not ‘really a man/woman’. Others are pressured to undertake masculinising or feminising medical treatments and surgery so they are clearly seen to be the ‘opposite’ sex of their partner lest the relationship be thought of as somehow ‘gay’.
Although generalised revulsion against physical differences may account for some of the prejudice, the driver is fears held by many that if the sex of a person is uncertain then the nature of that person’s sexual relationships is uncertain.
Intersex people are not part of LGBTIQ because of sexual orientation or gender identity. All of us in that alliance are bound by the nature of our oppression — homophobia.
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I myself _have_ been the target of homophobia; countlessly, and with near deadly force.
What I believe the article-writer is saying, is that the LGBTQIAA2______+yadda+yadda (forgive me, I don’t remember how long the acronym is now) are meant/supposed to be united against a common foe:
harmful heteronormativity, homophobia, etc.
Why, it’s almost as if we’re meant to be united together supporting ALL human rights as opposed to only those of sexual orientation, or gender identity, etc.
Basically, each rainbow-acronym group should be uniting like a GSA/PFLAG/HRC/LGBTQIAA2O(etcetera) super-group.
It’s not that membership is dependant on same-sex relationships, or anything else – it’s about binding ourselves together in solidarity.
The article writer says things like,
Intersex people usually aren’t gay,
some times are in a so-called same sex relationship when they technically aren’t,
and they face ridicule, and expulsion even from these groups, their jobs, so on.
People forget about intersex.
I’ve heard so much rhetoric about people with intersex conditions while no one knew such a person (myself) was sitting in the room listening to their far off remarks.
It happens.
I’ve been fired for my physical/bodily appearance while working as a mechanic and shipping distributor despite not working with the public, and having perfectly good compliance with the company dress codes, standards of appearance, etc.
I have been harassed as a lesbian, gay man, freak, sissy, tomboy, tranny, and other things – even though I was born this way – and have been different since before taking my first breath of air.
This doesn’t mean I’m better than anyone, it means I’m here for everyone’s human rights – and my rights too.
Puzzled
All in the LGBTIQ acronym have different experiences and different needs. So simple notions of sexual orientation cannot be the reason for the alliance. Trans for instance are not bound to the alliance because of sexual preference and some have argued for separation because of this. Bi have what might appear to be, in part, a heterosexual sexual orientation and in that have quite different political and social needs to L and G.
Intersex are subjected to the same “Gay” bashing as children and teens ,young adults and often as Adults as indistinguishable from any other “gay” bashing. We are subjected to the same homophobic fears by our partners , family , friends and the wider community as any other LGB person. Whether we see ourselves in binary terms and as heterosexual is irrelevant to those who persecute us . Like many who might be thought of as being LGBTIQ the issue so far as violence is concerned is not how they perceive themselves it is how they are perceived by those who oppress them.
The remedies we need hinge on Society rejecting Homophobic oppression and accepting all people irrespective of sexual orientation or perceived sexual orientation
I’m really puzzled by this article. Is this the crux of your argument?
(a) intersex people are not like g/l/b/t people in that they’re “more likely to be perceived as heterosexual” and “appear to conform to typically man or woman than gender non-conforming”
(b) instead, the alliance with g/l/b/t people is based on intersex people’s experience of homophobia: “all of us in that alliance are bound by the nature of our oppression — homophobia”
(c) the homophobia experienced by intersex people manifests as ‘parents of intersex babies fearing that their child is gay’ and ‘Many intersex are rejected by their partners because of … notions that their partner is not ‘really a man/woman’
Whoa. Hold up!
As a gay man I’ve seen and experienced homophobia (“a fear/ hatred of homosexuality”), and, to put it bluntly, what you are describing is NOT homophobia. It seems to be overwhelmingly concerned with ambiguous genitalia/ sexual organs and people’s resulting reactions/ discomfort: that is definitely oppression, but its not homophobia.
You’re argument lends itself to a troubling extrapolation: intersex people actually have NOTHING in common with g/l/b/t people beyond being subject to (a different type of) oppression: the alliance between them arises from political expediency.
As a gay man I don’t define myself by oppression or biology; rather, its the choices I make and the statements I use to describe myself to the world that make me who I am. If intersex people define themselves in biological terms, go to pains to differentiate themselves from gay/ trans people (and in terms which flirt dangerously with concepts of ‘normalcy’ if this article is to be used as a representative example), and base their alliance on an inaccurate definition of homophobia, then what do I, as a gay man, actually have in common with them?
And more to the point, what’s in this alliance for me?
Let me be clear – I do have solidarity with my intersex brothers/ sisters and others, but its not on this basis.
Sexual minorities all have different experiences and stories, but what we do have in common is a sense of purpose about taking control of our lives and destinies and fighting to ensure that we are not denied equal protections and rights as a matter of principle, not biology.