Loading ...- Category:
- Soap Box
- Author:
- Phil Scott
- Posted:
- Wednesday, 11 February 2009
Last week’s rumours of a move to Homebush for the Mardi Gras parade have been put to rest.
It was all a mistake! People were misled by the silly coincidence that leaders of NMG had been shown around the Superdome, wined and dined with a cold seafood platter, then given an offer they couldn’t refuse. But refuse they did, even though surveys indicate that the suburb of Homebush is 300 percent lesbian.
Online protesters pointed out, quite rightly, that visibility is an important factor of the parade. It’s not just cult entertainment, like a Formula One car race: the parade doesn’t really do its job unless it gets up a few people’s noses and reminds them of something they’d rather forget. Us.
So we can all relax again. Or can we? This column can now exclusively reveal the true NMG agenda. Homebush was a decoy, to distract us from other radical plans. Mardi Gras will be leaving Oxford St, but it won’t be heading west. It will be relocated to Mosman.
No one at this stage is prepared to go on the record, yet support for the move seems to be growing.
Mosman boasts long, wide streets, explained one insider, with ancient tree branches forming a natural canopy. Very good for shade, when onlookers are waiting three or four hours for the parade to start.
Also, while Mosman is a residential area, the number of residents per square kilometre is the lowest in Sydney, and most of them are senile, immobile, or both. So we anticipate much less trouble.
A Mosman resident, when asked her opinion, said: Are you here to rake the leaves? Use the servants’ entrance from now on.
Speaking on behalf of the State Government, an events person enthused, We think it’s an excellent compromise. The Homebush plan was to keep the whole parade out of sight, but this idea is even better. Nothing that happens in Mosman has any connection to the real world.
Rev. Fred Nile voiced cautious support, but pointed out, I worry about the close proximity to Taronga Park Zoo. The zoo is a family destination. Christian children go there. How would it be if they got mixed up with a bunch of paradophiles?
And the Mardi Gras could have an evil influence on the animals. These are God’s innocent creatures. If they start aping same-sex behaviour, their species could die out and the zoo would have to close.
The Mosman Blueprint, as it is called, is still to be ratified by the MG board. A bigger hurdle may be the Mosman Council, who also need to give it their blessing. A councillor who wished to remain anonymous remarked, I can’t see it happening in my lifetime. That is, over the next two years.
Tags: Homebush, Mardi Gras moving, Mosman
February 16th, 2009 @ 11:44 am
Oxford St is the gay capital of Sydney, Mosman is a small area of Sydney, the parade does better on Oxford St, because Oxford St is deemed a gay area, plus the noise levels arent a problem, if they move our annual parade to Mosman, the chances of residents complaining about the noise levels is a major risk in this area, nearby we had residents complaining about the noise of luna park and unfortunately that was closed down (later reopening) Mosman has the potential to be the same…
February 17th, 2009 @ 4:16 pm
Hi Chris. One of us doesn’t get irony….
February 18th, 2009 @ 10:49 am
I strongly object to the false comment in my name. I never made any remarks as falsely quoted.
The Homosexual Mardi Gras has had its day. It is old hat and should be quietly put to rest.
Rev Fred Nile