Loading ...- Category:
- Soap Box
- Author:
- Phil Scott
- Posted:
- Tuesday, 21 April 2009
What do you think of the cutesy-poo Centrelink ad? The one that shows two identical shots of a pair of toothbrushes in a single glass tumbler, one pic labelled GAY and the other STRAIGHT.
The copy says: If you’re a couple at home, you’re now a couple at Centrelink. Good to finally discover Centrelink’s standard of a de facto relationship: sharing a toothbrush glass. That’s highly discriminatory against people with no teeth, but let it pass.
The underlying government message is: you queers have been ripping us off, living as couples while you receive single pension benefits, but now we’re on to you. We recognise you!
I’ve always earned a good living. (Touch papier-mâche.) Yet where would my partner and I stand if we were unemployed? We don’t live together but we frequently share expenses. We splurge on special treats, driven by tender loving same-sex commitment. For example, I often pick up the check at our favourite nosherie, Le Pelican in Bourke St.
(Aside: This irrelevant plug is part of my sneaky plan to get the Star to hire me as a subsidised food critic. Still-¦ if you’re thinking of becoming a couple, Le Pelican is the perfect place to negotiate the terms before you cement the deal in bed.)
What about the opposite case: gays who live together and give every impression of being a couple when the attraction has long since fizzled? Why should people who cheat on each other split the same dole cheque? It’s adding insult to penury.
Speaking of bureaucracy, I went guarantor for a friend applying to renew his passport. A guarantor cannot be a relative, or spouse, or in a relationship with the applicant including same-sex relationships. (They actually write that in brackets; we remain an embarrassing afterthought.) Different department, same purpose: to stop us taking advantage of our non-person status.
It would be nice if this so-called recognition extended to its logical conclusion: same-sex marriage. It would be nice if, instead of just being punitive, official recognition had a symbolic resonance and was about genuine equality. Why? Because couples are couples. It’d make life easier for Centrelink, too.
But things ain’t like that in backward, Bible-bashing Australia. Politicians still listen to people in the redneck marginal seats that make or break a government.
Unless that changes, I reckon it’s justifiable for gay de factos to act a little noncommittal. If you’re both on the dole you’d be mad to declare your relationship. You might feel warm and fuzzy on the day, but wouldn’t you rather be eating at Le Pelican? Wouldn’t you rather get a little extra dough for unforseen expenses? That old dildo needs replacing and the cat won’t de-sex itself!
Until we are fully recognised, it only costs a few bucks to buy a second tumbler and keep your toothbrushes separate.
Don’t forget your toothbrush.
Tags: Ad, Centrelink, Centrelink changes, de-facto relationships, toothbrush add
April 24th, 2009 @ 7:27 am
I give Centrelink points for stepping up to the place with this subject. The local manager asked me about any information that she could pass on to local G&L people, and pointed out that key service staff have been trained up in how to deal with such a subject to clients.
My own experience was a few years ago, and my partner was without work. I went in with him to the local Centrelink office and we had nothing bad to say about the experience. The staff explained things well and did not really care if we were a same sex couple at that stage.
April 24th, 2009 @ 11:13 am
If you’re in a financially unequal relationship the higher earner can elect to claim the ‘dependent spouse offset’ from the ATO, exactly as married and oppsex de factos can, from July 1. You can also combine your medical expenses to claim an offset, too. So it’s not all bad. http://tinyurl.com/d3cbrh
April 24th, 2009 @ 12:21 pm
Perhaps if Centrelink opened a site office at le Pelican then two canards can be killed with one kidney stone.
April 26th, 2009 @ 12:26 am
Unless that changes, I reckon it’s justifiable for gay de factos to act a little noncommittal. If you’re both on the dole you’d be mad to -œdeclare your relationship. You might feel warm and fuzzy on the day, but wouldn’t you rather be eating at Le Pelican? Wouldn’t you rather get a little extra dough for unforseen expenses? That old dildo needs replacing and the cat won’t de-sex itself!
Until we are fully recognised, it only costs a few bucks to buy a second tumbler and keep your toothbrushes separate.
Don’t forget your toothbrush.
hahaahhaha yep i doubt they will be lining up in droves to declare dont u? its all or nothing that’s it.