Gay slurs led to suicide

Gay slurs led to suicide

Homophobic taunts played a significant role in the suicide of a 14-year-old boy, a coronial inquest has found.

On July 25 2008 Kadina High School student Alex Wildman was found dead in the garage of his Lismore home. Two days earlier, months of harassment by other students culminated in Wildman being struck in the head while two other boys held his hair and a group of students looked on.

Just months earlier students had left homophobic messages on MySpace, calling him gay and a faggot.

“Why you go back out [sic] with that faggot … I hope he dies in a hole,” one message said.

Alex was also bullied at Sydney high schools before moving to the north coast in a bid to escape the homophobic taunts, the inquest heard.

Handing down his finding last week, Deputy State Coroner Malcolm MacPherson recommended the NSW Education Department ensure high schools with more than 500 students employ full-time counsellors and have dedicated email, phone, text or chat room options to report bullying.

He also recommended the introduction of legislation similar to South Australia giving schools jurisdiction over cyber-bullying and incidents between students outside school hours.

“Without excusing the bullying behaviour, it appears some of the bullying arose because of Alex’s relationships with girls and because of his failure to respond to physical violence,” MacPherson said.

“The problem … particularly as it applies to the modern phenomenon of cyber-bullying, is an issue for the whole school community.”

WayOut rural youth project coordinator Sue Hackney told Sydney Star Observer a recent survey of high school students from regional Victoria showed homophobia did not only affect same-sex attracted youth.

“Our survey shows that among people who identify as heterosexual, the experiences they have with homophobia are just as damaging,” Hackney said.

“Probably more so with the young men. If the young men are doing things the group culture believes is not consistent with the image they want to project, they’ll call each other a ‘faggot’ and they’ll use homophobic language as a way of monitoring behaviour.”

ACON community health director Craig Cooper said the homophobic bullying of heterosexuals needed to be taken seriously.

“Homophobic abuse, no matter who it’s directed at, is still a form of vilification and is therefore unacceptable,” he said.

“Helping young people understand the broader impact that homophobic abuse has is just as important as helping them understand the impact that such abuse has on GLBT individuals’ health and wellbeing.”

Anti-discrimination laws in NSW and Victoria protect people from abuse where a perpetrator has misassumed their sexuality, but no state protects people from being vilified as a sexuality the perpetrator knows they are not.

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21 responses to “Gay slurs led to suicide”

  1. Well, Craig h, GLBTQ folk have heterosexuality pushed in their faces every day – at work, at school, in the newspapers, on TV etc.

    I was in a Sydney surf club for 30 years and the straight talk was sex sex sex sex …..

    Are homosexuals really pushing anything in your face by simply being themselves? And how does it hurt you anyway?

    Oh, and you cannot convert someone to being gay (or the other way around).

    Live and let live,mate.

  2. At high school all the gay students ever talked about was their dicks,sex sex sex, orgasims and trying to convert straight students into gays.
    I dont hate gays but wonder if these types of people have anything other than their sexulaity that they openly try to convert followers in life.
    Who speaks for the straight students bashed and pelted with long neck beer bottles?
    Straight australia realy doesnt care if ya gay or not.\
    We just dont want it pushed in our face.

  3. How terribly sad it is that yet another young life is snuffed out because of bigotry and ignorance. But, I am an old gay man, in the twilight of my life, and I know that many similar stories stretch back through history and will continue into the future. When I was seventeen my then boyfriend blew half his face off with a shotgun when his parents found out that he was gay. For my part I have given up expecting gay right to come to in my life and because of that I have not voted in a state or federal election for some years now. I present myself at the ballot box each Election Day, and have my name ticked off. I then deface the ballot papers with the words, ‘no gay rights? No vote, that simple’. I may achieve nothing for doing this, but then I have achieved nothing for gay rights by casting a vote in previous elections, and now, as I walk away after casting an invalid vote, I do feel a little better and I hear my long dead lover whispering, “is it over, are we free at last” and I whisper back “not yet my love but, hopefully, one day.
    Peter

  4. High Schools are a Homophobic place…well no shit sherlock.

    It’s time the ALP State Government confront the elephant in the room of High School bullying….

    Homophobia!!!!!

  5. The federal government has just held a senate inquiry on suicide in Australia and have just the other day finally tabled a report in parliament. The report is very intensive with 178 pages. Now in the report the senate committee who conducted the inquiry recommends that:

    A national suicide prevention and awareness campaign should include a targeted approach to high-risk groups, in
    particular young people, people in rural and remote areas, men, Indigenous populations, lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and intersex people and the culturally and linguistically diverse communities. This approach should include the provision of culturally sensitive and appropriate information and services.

    The report also claims that six Australians take their own life every day !!! Now how can Julia Gillard ignore that ???

    Here is a link to the report which details GLBTI suicide: http://www.aph.gov.au/senate/committee/clac_ctte/suicide/report/report.pdf

    Its worth reading it just for the section which states:

    A number of LGBTI organisations considered that the priorities and needs of LGBTI people had not been recognised in government policy relating to mental health
    and suicide such as the NSPS or by related organisations such as Beyondblue.

  6. Mannie De Saxe, Lesbian and Gay Solidarity Melbourne.

    During the 1980s and 1990s we kept up a running battle at the Anti-Discrimination Board’s gay and lesbian consultations with the New South Wales Ministers and Department of Education over their refusal to make mandatory their module about homosexuality after they made compulsory their module on racism in their life and society classes.

    We were met with outright refusals despite meetings with the ministers and members of their department.

    Nearly 20 years later nothing has changed. Beyondblue, Jeff Kennett’s organisation to address depression and suicide refuses to acknowledge the existence of the gay, lesbian, transgender and HIV/AIDS communities. Young and old suffer accordingly.

    Fortunately, but too late for Alex Wildman and his family, Suicide Prevention Australia addresses the problems in our communities and offers help where possible, and there are a few other organisations today offering assistance.

    Unfortunately, regional and rural areas are not sufficiently covered, but at least online and phone counselling help are available.

    Mannie De Saxe, Lesbian and Gay Solidarity, Melbourne.

  7. New South Wales doesn’t cover much of the Transgender community at all either. Antidiscrimination stuff covers Transsexuals but not Bi-Gender Genderqueer Crossdressers or Drag! Also Intersex is also not covered.

    And with Male-to-female Crossdressers alone 2%-10% of all males regular closeted crossdressers let alone the rest thats a lot of people it’s totally legal to discriminate against.

  8. – Hi Baz,

    Most politicians of any party twist things the way that suits them: they’d call beige ‘turquoise’ if they could (and bring in a legislation to ensure that it stayed that way ;o) Thus the term ‘economic liberalism’ should literally mean ‘economic generosity’ or even ‘economic fairness’, and this hasn’t been the case with the conservative Australian Liberal Party, particularly of recent years (except for the wealthy).

    Additionally, it’s society that lets such terms maintain their twisted meanings, through being social constructs; thus, we can also socially ‘deconstruct’ things that essentially are incorrect.

    – Hi Ian,

    What we need is to get a complete and rounded education in primary- and high-schools, where they would included lessons about full diversity; about GLBTQI issues; against homophobia; that homosexuals are not paedophiles, and that homosexuals should not be used as scapegoats for this woe of society; (etc, etc). But currently, it seems that the only way this would happen would be if an influential and wealthy GLBTQI could make a stand, because it’s only the influential and wealthy that politicians really take note of (for example: did anyone see that recent picture of Julie Bishop in the news where she’s nearly embracing that wealthy billionaire mining person? Is he a best friend? Is he a long lost family member? Maybe; but needless to say, I doubt it very much; especially when you look at the body language).

    – Meanwhile… Good luck Julia Gillard. You seemed to be more approachable than Mr Rudd, let’s hope that you can carry through all the issues that Rudd dropped, including GLBTQI issues.

    Let’s also hope that you will make a move on making bullying illegal; acknowledge that suicides do come from homophobic bullying; and as you have dealt with Education, let’s hope that you will make a real difference with the currently sparse ‘Education Revolution’, as there is now no excuse of what Rudd does or doesn’t want. Thus, please include education about GLBTQI issues. Please.

  9. very sad to see this type of results leading to suicide is still happening-

    Im currently involved in suicide prevention around the country- i see in remote areas like tasmania and brisbane, that youth suicide is still very high – due to sexual orientation /Homphobobic and bullying. Its sad annoying and disturbing. Im also sorry to say that we dont have anyone thats strong enough to support this problem in australia. Gay groups try but cant win due to funding or the fact they also aret strong enough- goverment, well lets forget them,Homphobobic political morons. Acon groups – only out for the money – local medical staff- not trained enough to support the topic. Its just crazy where this has lead over the years. The best education and support is the people in our country who are open minded, carring and supportive.

    I wish i could help more then i do! we need more strong hands, and people in this community who really speak there minds. Make a difference instead of being political correct in saying so.

    we hope for change

  10. It’s about economic liberalism Tony, not social. The party was formed in the early 1940s when communism was seen as a world-wide threat. In American politics the term ‘liberal’ is meant more literally. Though try explaining to one of them how our Liberals are the entrenched conservatives.

  11. Some food for thought, inspired by Dave’s comment above: When is our country going to challenge the Australian Liberal Party’s misnomer? In my Macquarie Dictionary, ‘liberal’ means:

    1. favourable to progress or reform, as in religious or political affairs.
    2. (capital) of or relating to the Liberal Party of Australia, or any of various Liberal parties in other countries.
    3. favourable to or in accord with the policy of leaving the individual as unrestricted as possible in the opportunities for self-expression or self-fulfilment.
    4. of representational forms of government rather than aristocracies and monarchies.
    5. free from prejudice or bigotry; tolerant.
    6. giving freely or in ample measure: a liberal donor.
    7. given freely or abundantly: a liberal donation.
    8. not strict or rigorous: a liberal interpretation of a rule.

    Number one’s meaning of ‘progress’ is very subjective in the Party (ie: ‘progress’ is more in the eye of the beholder: whose ‘progress’ is theirs relating to?). The Party’s meaning of ‘reform’ is correct, but quite often these days, it’s more on an argumentative, perverse and/or self-interest lead level. Mind you, the Australian Labor Party is no better these days.

    Number two’s description is obviously ‘correct’, but nonetheless ambiguous; and the other descriptions are otherwise seemingly irrelevant to describe The Australian Liberal Party. Additionally, they are known to be; and are proud to be recognised as, conservative… so there’s a bit of a paradox here too. Or is it the Party’s title an attempt of ironic humour? Perhaps we could we collectively sue them for false advertising? No wonder Malcolm Fraser has left the Party. If no other reason, shouldn’t the name ‘liberal’ be removed from the Party’s title for the sake of correctly educating our children?

    Meanwhile, Mr Be-seen-to-go-to-church-because-Abbott-does Rudd could learn from point three of the real meaning of the word ‘liberal’, in relation to full equal rights for GLBTIs. Has he forgotten since he was elected, or does he just get confused with the differences between ‘liberal’ and ‘Liberal’?

    Wouldn’t it be nice to not be cynical about politicians (or at least, not as much as we are these days)? And what is sad is that many of them don’t seem to care that the populous is fed up with them. As long as they get their politician’s pension, then they can weather anything.

  12. Tony- I think we could start by getting rid of Religious Education in schools. You are right, Ethics should be taught. I know Cardinal Pell is having a melt down about that. We need better homophobic programs. The Federal Government is spending 242 million dollars on school Chaplain programs for the Australian Christian Lobby, but $0.00 on homophobic programs that would help protect young GLTBQI people.

    The Prime Minister and Opposition Leader do not care about what happened to Alex. They have no heart and are bitter and twisted bastards.

  13. It’s quite interesting that this story has been covered in the daily telegraph quite extensively, but not once was homophobia mentioned.

    Editor’s Note: Exactly why we felt it necessary to bring to everyone’s attention John. A questionable oversight on behalf of that particular publication.

  14. I wish the Department of Education would pull its finger out and be proactive about bringing in laws to make bullying illegal. And not only be proactive per se; but be seen by the wider community as *being* proactive: to get things moving until the state and federal governments can be bothered to support us fully, including long-due education on GLBTI issues to be included in the curriculum, from primary through to high school. Until we are lucky to have a government (whatever party) that sincerely cares about its people, rather than skulking behind and pandering towards religious big-wigs that are full of hatred and hypocrisy, then we and our supporters have a long way to go, regardless of the progress that has happened in recent years.

    As we know, homophobes see our sexuality as ‘unnatural’; however this is easy to challenge. I think we can safely assumed that most of them are not chaste; thus, unless their sexual activity (including masturbation) only leads to procreation, then they too are being ‘unnatural’, because that is the only real reason for sex.

    Another way to help reduce homophobia would be through the educational ‘ethics lessons’ that some religious people are against. I feel that their concerns are laughable; surely stemming from a deeply suppressed insecurity. If they are so strong in their religious beliefs, how could they be so threatened about something that can add to the positive side of scripture lessons? It’s people like these who give religion a bad name; they seem to conveniently forget that Jesus was also a key teacher of ethics (and inclusivity). It’s a pity that those hateful people are so selective in what they choose to recognise as ethics. Oh for another Jesus (or any of the other good, loving and inclusive prophets that other religions also aspire to).

    We must all actively challenge homophobes, because their arguments, as we can see, are very flimsy.

  15. Try to imagine what Alex’s parents must be feeling. I’m absolutely certain that if Alex’s parents were gay, f/f, m/m (legally) the Australian community’s attitude & response would have been markedly diferent.
    An official pilgrimmage by the Ssisters of perpetual Indulgence to Lismore seems a rather good idea at the moment?
    Love from Hell xoxo

  16. Poor young Alex suffered. Nobody deserves that kind of treatment. School was a horrible place for some of us. Sadly Alex Bullies were given legitimacy by Tony Abbott after Alex took his own life.

    I remember the launch of How To Drug-Proof Your Kids in 2009. Tony Abbot gave a speech for Focus on the Family, an Evangelical Christian Group that excludes us as Family and has lobbied for us to have reduced rights in Senate Submissions.

    At the launch, he quoted a conversation with his daughter when she said “You’re just a lame, gay..”. This was followed by much laughing from the Evangelical Crowd. The message was Gay is a bad thing. Use it against people, use it as a bad word to describe people. It should be used by teenagers to degrade others. The effects of such a public speech are devastating to people like Alex. They are still in our schools, still getting bullied.

    Tony Abbott chose his words carefully. He did not say this was a bad thing. He did correct her, nor did he say sorry to any person who is Gay. He just gave currency and support to all bullies like those the killed young Alex.

    Children look for adults to model behavior. If the alternative Prime Minister becomes Prime Minister, then we will see a lot more of people like Alex looking at suicide as a way out.

    A link about what Tony Abbott said is below.

    http://www.smh.com.au/national/abbott-lame-gay-churchy-loser-says-his-daughter-20090813-eiu1.html

    Focus on the Family Website.

    http://www.families.org.au

  17. Untill heterosexual society acknoledges that homophobia is a problem in schools then I can only see the situation getting worse and worse. I remember reading about Alex Wildmans suicide in the mainstream newspapers and they suggested that more needs to be done to prevent cyber bullying and they totally ignored homophobia which was the cause of the cyber bullying in the first place which probably contributed to his death. Shame Australia shame.

  18. I hope the little bastards at Kadina High feel proud of themselves. Too bad they can’t be sent to a place where they’d be on the receiving end.