“Heated Rivalry” Inspires Real-Life Coming Out For Gay Hockey Player

A real-life hockey player has gone viral after sharing his coming out story on social media, crediting the hugely successful gay hockey show Heated Rivalry for giving him the confidence.

In a post made to Facebook, Jesse Kortuem said that although didn’t usually share much to social media the show had “sparked” something in him.

Growing up as the youngest of four boys in the hockey-mad state of Minnesota, he spoke about never quite fitting into a world where masculinity and competition were so integral to the community around him.

“I lived in a constant state of dichotomy. I loved the game, but I lived with a persistent fear. I wondered how I could be gay and still play such a tough and masculine sport,” he said.

“To my younger self, that identity could never be revealed. I did not think those two worlds could occupy the same person, let alone the same locker room. Coming out in the 2000s did not feel like an option, especially with so little positive representation in the media at the time and it would have been a social disaster at such a large high school.”

After leaving his high school hockey team as a 17 year old, Kortuem didn’t find himself on the rink again until he was living interstate, and although he was out to some of the people around him, he wasn’t able to bring that part of his identity to the sport, concerned that the revelation would change the way his team saw him.

“The struggle to reconcile these two halves of my life reached a breaking point in 2017,” he said. “I was ready to just remain a closeted player in straight leagues for good, or even worse, hang up the skates forever.”

Kortuem’s message to those still in the closet

A last minute decision saw Kortuem decide to compete in a gay hockey tournament for the Sin City Classic in Las Vegas, the largest annual LGBTQIA+ sporting event in the world, which would prove to be a “paradigm shift”.

“From that moment forward, my life has never been the same. It has been a long, vulnerable road to move past the closeted athlete persona (something I’m still working on today) and find actual peace through the friendships I have developed,” he said.

Today, Kortuem plays for the Vancouver-based LGBTQIA+ hockey team, the Cutting Edges, where he said he has now found his peace.

Founded in 1994 for the Gay Games in New York, the Cutting Edges started with a scrappy eight members before becoming officially registered society four years later, and have gone on to recruit hundreds of players, young and old.

The vulnerable story has tugged heartstrings around the world, going to show that although Heated Rivalry may be infamous for its steamy sex scenes, the exploration of queer identities in sport is still a hugely important topic for some people.

“This is my story,” he said. “It is not everyone’s story, but for what it is worth, I thought I would share because I want to speak to the athletes out there who are still in the closet or struggling to find their way.

“I want you to know that there is hope and you’re not alone. There is a life and a deep happiness waiting for you on your path. You will get through this, and it is going to be okay.”