One thing that rocks my apple cart is the ‘he, she, is it or not’ question that, even today, is thrown around carelessly.
I was performing in the city recently and a gorgeous feminine creature glided in and grabbed a seat.
It was a karaoke show, so after thumbing through the songbooks she wrote down a song and waited her turn.
I was hit with questions — “Is it a man?” or “What is it?” — people not being discreet, blurting it out, not caring for the feelings of this young girl.
It was soon her turn. She took the stage and, to everyone’s delight, out came a delicate feminine voice that had the crowd cheering. After the song she softly thanked the audience and left the stage, not harming a soul.
She actually was born male but for all arguments she presented herself as a female so she should be treated as a female.
The old saying of ‘Sticks and stones may break my bones but words can never hurt me’ isn’t true at all. Some words cut the deepest, leaving scars for years.
At what point do you get to live without 20 questions whenever you walk into a room? Is it ever OK to barge over and confront someone with “Are you a boy or girl?” just for your own sake. Isn’t a person just a person, boy or girl?
The rules are easy. I learnt this from my dearly departed grandmother, Shirley. If what you see in front of you looks and acts feminine, refer to her as a girl. If a male is what you see, then it’s a boy. If that’s too hard, put your hand out and introduce yourself. Now you have the person’s name and all is fixed.
Shirley used this rule when we lived in central Queensland. She was a social worker who did home visits. Some of the old country ladies working their properties would be decked out head-to-toe in King Gee. “Hello, my name is Shirley,” my grandmother would announce, hand firmly out.
Our community needs to stand up and show everyone that acceptance is what is important. If we respect one another, surely this will teach society that we are all different. That’s what makes us special.
And please never use the word it, or this boy/ girl/ man/ woman/ drag queen will tell you why personally!