Don’t Stare Too Much! is a visual and physical comedy inspired by dating advice books and the drawbacks of modern romance.

With a name drawn from one of the golden rules of the singles dating scene and directed by Jo Turner, the show makes a triumphant return to the Darlinghurst Theatre from Saturday 3 January.

It’s the campest show about straight people you could ever imagine (we hope to create the gay edition next). Plus two male actors in the cast are gay and will be gagging for a free drink at the bar after. And we are both single, and relatively easy to get drunk, said actor Brendon McDonall.

It’s a unique register of acting as it requires complete physical
precision and emotional earnestness but you are doing the most ridiculous things like masturbating with a finger up your bum or erotically smelling cheese in a supermarket.

The score features tunes from the likes of Elton John, Lauren Hill, Kids in the Kitchen, Nick Cave and the Black Eyed Peas. McDonall said they serve the same purpose as they do in our lives, to create and retrieve memories.

The soundtrack plays right through and is essentially the dialogue. A lot of the scenes were inspired by particular songs, he said.

The audience will never see self-help books the same way again.

It’s hugely entertaining and unique. It’s like watching a human train wreck. Love hurts and it makes people do the strangest things. We guarantee you will recognise yourself in these stories. Plus you see me masturbate and stick a finger up my bum.

info: Tickets start from $25. Bookings on or 8356 9987.

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