Being polite online
Everyone has cravings. For some it’s chocolate, coffee or going to the gym. While I get cravings for all of those things (except for going to the gym), by far my biggest craving is Gaydar. I have become what you would call a ‘frequent’ user. Living in western Sydney, I take full advantage of the internet and other technologies that keep connected me to the community.
But the one thing I have really noticed on profiles are comments like, “No Fatties, Fems, Oldies or GAMS”.
I know the reason for doing this is because everyone has a type they find most attractive. I agree, it’s good to be clear about what you want and I know that it’s not the place to be completely politically correct. But I think there’s a nicer way of saying what you want or are looking for.
Nobody likes rejection, especially not regularly by people they haven’t even met. But it shows you to have a negative attitude. I’m sure for a lot of people a positive attitude is a much bigger turn-on.
I found an interesting website that talks about possible ways of rewording different phrases — www.sexualracismsux.com.
Rather than using negative terms like “No Fats, Fems or GAMs”, you could say, “Looking for slim, fit, masculine guys. Usually prefer men of [Caucasian, Latino, black] background”.
Again, everyone has a type. That’s completely OK. It’s just about the way you express it for others to read.
info: If you want any information about groups, services, organisations or community events taking place in western Sydney, you can contact Matt Vaughan at ACON on 9206 2064 or mvaughan@acon.org.au.
Matt Vaughan is the community development and liaison officer for the ACON Western Sydney Community Development Team.
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I agree, when ever I see people using those negative terms on gaydar etc I automatically think “bitchy queen wannabe” or ” A try hard that’s trying to appear cool or different by expressing themselves with a clich