Our own worst enemies

When did we all get so bitchy? I really don’t understand why a minority would want to attack itself so much. There are lesbians who hate gay men and vice versa, twinks who hate bears and vice versa. I have femme friends who until only a year and a half ago were still being denied access to dyke bars, or asked, “Honey, you do realise this is a gay girls’ night, don’t you?”
Our community seems to chew up and spit out anything that doesn’t fit the mould of what it thinks we should be, act like, trust in. We are at such odds with ourselves – how are we to overcome the obstacles the heterosexual world has put before us? In a lot of instances the GLBTI community is much more harmful to itself than anyone else could ever be.
For example, there is a lot of talk about the gay community not wanting same-sex marriage. You might agree, but denying someone within your own “gay family” the right to marry is giving the heterosexuals who made the law in the first place something to pinpoint and say, “See, you don’t even want it,” and this is unfair. You don’t have to get married if you don’t believe in it but it might be nice to show solidarity and help those who do want to get married.
This might at least give the impression that our community is a force to be reckoned with when we are confronted with disrespect and discriminatory laws. Otherwise we come across like a pack of petulant five-year-olds.
I was at a bar the other night and overheard a couple of young guys bitching about the violence in Darlinghurst. When I leant over and asked them if they had done anything to help the situation, e.g. volunteering with anti-violence projects, they looked at me with utter horror and then squealed with laughter and said, “No, it’s not our problem to fix, it’s the Council’s.”
There we have it, folks. It’s not our problem. I would love to take those boys round for a cup of tea to one of my 78er friends’ houses and, after hearing about Stonewall and those first few Mardi Gras parades, have those delightful young guys tell me it’s not their problem.
But now I’m bitching about a younger generation like an old biddy. All I’m saying is try to help one another, join community groups if you aren’t happy with your lot. Stop sabotaging each other. We are all in the same boat here so try not to shoot holes in the hull.