As the Gen Y prince married his pert new bride, I wondered how Kate managed to steal my fairytale life. No, not really. I’m more a ‘Team Harry’ queen anyway.

Yes, I’m still talking about the royal wedding. But what if Willy liked willy?

I wond

er how the world would have felt if the couple was gay or lesbian, or any other couple not considered ‘normal’. Would it have been awkward? Absolutely! Not because it’s wrong. But because we’re inured to think of heterosexual imagery as ‘natural’.

I loathe the word ‘normal’. It’s like a cancer that eats at the core of progress. You only need ask a beige person what they mean to see them flounder for any tangible meaning. “You know, as in normal,” they insist. Uum, not really. You’re just repeating yourself.

Normal is such a subjective term. “I get up at a normal time.” “I think they’re a normal couple.” “Having a sex change is not normal.”

Enough already! What you mean is something that meets your expectations or understanding. And it doesn’t just apply to GLBTI rights — which are no more than human rights, incidentally.

Most religious schools still embrace atrocious misapprehensions, peddling shame and hatred like cupcakes, indoctrinating gender diverse kids to harbour intense feelings of self-loathing. They teach them they’re not normal.

Sometimes when I see a ‘gay kiss’ on telly, I cringe. Even the kiss between Kurt and his cheesy romantic interest on Glee — as natural and tasteful as it was — was awkward. But not because it’s wrong. But because we’re conditioned to feel it’s not normal. British Prime Minister David Cameron wants to restrict same-sex kisses on television. Yes, when in doubt, out comes the ‘normal’ card.

If Prince William were gay, obviously he wouldn’t have married a dude. Although the sex tape would have been a ripper. But what a coo — to see two men marry before the world. For the crowds to be just as happy to see a homo couple marry, as mesmerised as they were by the privileged heterosexual couple that has absolutely no relevance to their lives.

And now Uganda wants to ‘Kill the Gays’?

We really need to start challenging our understanding of ‘normal’. Don’t worry, cobber — it probably won’t happen in ‘your backyard’ anytime soon. But it is intrinsic to evolution in a progressive society.

Yes, if Kate hadn’t nabbed my fairytale ending, you may have seen yours truly donning an Alexander McQueen gown and marrying the British heir. Sounds perfectly normal to me.

I still prefer Harry though.

info: Follow SSO at @star_observer and Damien @damientweeting

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