Big Dreams, Big Pride: What Do You Want Your Rainbow Family To Look Like?

With the city awash in colour and pride dialled all the way up, Sydney Mardi Gras is the season of big feelings and even bigger dreams. And for some in the crowd, the celebration comes with a new kind of excitement: the possibility of little ones joining their future family.

LGBTQIA+ parents often need to navigate extra steps, including donor eggs, donor sperm, surrogacy, counselling and legal considerations. But to one fertility specialist, this complexity speaks to something beautiful. “It takes a village, not only to raise the child, but sometimes to make a child. They’re created all from a place of love.”

Dr Shadi Khashaba, fertility specialist at IVFAustralia,  encourages couples to begin by talking honestly with each other: What do you want your family to look like? How will you share the experience? How do you want to parent together?

And above all; take it slowly.

“Take it one step at a time,” he advises. Trying to control every moving part and lining up every piece of the puzzle at the same time — donors, embryos, surrogates, appointments — “can feel overwhelming.” 

Slow and steady, he adds, “always wins the race.”

A doctor who has lived the journey

What sets Shadi apart is that he doesn’t just support queer families: he is a member of one.

He and his partner John are proud dads of two children, born with the help of an egg donor and a close friend who carried both pregnancies. “She’s an angel,” he smiles.

Going through the process himself transformed the way he practices. He truly understands how his patients feel, how many moments are filled with both hope and fear. “I know the emotions that can go through the fertility journey, where nothing is 100% [certain]… You have to have trust and faith in the process and the people around you.”

And then comes the moment everything shifts: holding your child for the first time. Shadi describes it as a beautiful wave of emotions: “It’s suddenly like, ‘Oh, it’s real!’”

IVF: ‘If there’s a will, there is a way’

Shadi says society has come a long way in recognising LGBTQIA+ families, but he understands that for many queer people, the idea of approaching a fertility clinic still feels intimidating.

His advice is simple: you don’t have to know everything before you walk in the door. 

“It’s better to get information through a fertility specialist than Googling and getting lost with misinformation,” he says. And if you’re doing this with a partner, come together — you’re a team from day one.

For every queer person quietly wondering if parenthood is possible for them, Shadi offers a gentle but firm reassurance: “It is doable, just have a chat with a fertility specialist. If there’s a will, there is a way.”

To learn more or to start your journey of creating a family, visit IVFAustralia at ivf.com.au or call 1800 111 483.