How do you tell your child about homophobia?
I’ve had some very interesting conversations with my eight-year-old about the issues her parents face due to people who don’t support same-sex relationships.
Sometimes I can articulate myself fairly well and explain the finer points of homophobia. Other times all I can muster is “Because there are stupid people in this world”.
But how do you tell a small child there are people who believe the way we live our lives is wrong? These children are the innocent victims of that homophobia.
Let’s start by saying there are some people who feel uncomfortable with other people’s lifestyle choices that are different from theirs. Why? Because they don’t understand our differences and therefore are scared or confused by them. Or maybe, because they think we are more different than we actually are.
And how do you explain what religious beliefs have to do with all of this?
Instead of focusing on why people are like this and that these attitudes will persist, my tack has been to focus on what is so great about who we are.
When my daughter talks about having two mums as opposed to a mum and a dad, I talk about how lucky she is.
When others mention she doesn’t have a dad, I talk about the fact that she is so lucky to have two mums instead. I often get nods of agreement from her friends when I say how good it is to have two mums.
If I could tell you how many times I heard one of her friends say “I wish I had two mums too”. It shows you just where the negative attitudes come from. People aren’t born with them. It is not inherent in individuals to be homophobic, it is absolutely a learned behaviour.
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By NADINE SHARPE, Rainbow Babies and Kids
