Down and under

For anybody who ever spends idle hours perusing gay chat or porn sites -“ yeah, I’m talking to you, mate -“ one can’t have failed to notice the rise of the swimwear and underwear label, AussieBum.

Take a gander around sites like BigMuscle or DudesNude -“ go on -“ and you’ll see loads of guys showing off their multicultural bums in a pair of AussieBums.

Pretty quickly, AussieBum has become a hot brand, and almost everyone, it seems, wants to get into our underpants. Whoo!

There are lots of reasons behind this success. Firstly, the cossies and the undies look pretty tasty. And secondly, in a market where the Calvin Kleins and the 2xists have offered nothing but variations on tight white briefs -“ seemingly forever -“ the AussieBum brand has been a powerhouse of innovation, constantly pumping out new styles, and throwing colour around like a frocked-up party girl at the end of a B & S Ball.

But I wonder if part of the appeal of AussieBums for those overseas purchasers is that by putting a little piece of the land Down Under, down under, they’re hoping some Aussieness will rub off.

This is all fine and good when the world thinks of us Aussies as a spunky, carefree, fun-loving, thong-wearing kind of people, renowned for our irreverent ways and our love of the fair go.

But I wonder if this will last. Increasingly, it seems, Aussies are on the nose. We’re engaged in a hopeless war in Iraq; we’ve refused to sign the Kyoto protocol; and in sport, we’re rapidly developing a reputation for being drug cheats, or sore losers.

I have a bullshit, tell-you-after-three-beers theory that Brazilians are the new Aussies: the one people in the world (besides the Irish) who everyone seems to like. Think about it: they’re located in South America, which gives them underdog status; they have a healthy, beachy sort of culture; they seem to enjoy getting around in very little clothing; and from what I can see (try madeinbrazil.typepad.com), the men are all sexy as fuck.

Interestingly, AussieBum has already made headway in the Brazilian market. Smart move. And hey, if hot Brazilian party boys wanna swan around in AussieBums, maybe a bit of their hot Brazilianness will rub back off on us.