Gay Men Share Their Thoughts On Straight Women In LGBT Bars
Image: Representational Image. Photo by Hendo Wang on Unsplash
Have you gone out dancing or for a drink at your local queer space and noticed a lot of straight people? The subject usually evokes passionate responses. Maybe you’re in the, “more the merrier” camp or are you in the, “whole world is a straight bar, this is ours” camp?
Recently, a conversation started on the Askgaybros thread on Reddit about this very topic.
The question was, “What’re your thoughts on straight women going to gay bars? I know a lot of people have different views on this so I want to know yours.”
‘The Closest Thing To Church That We’ve Got’
One user shared, “I believe gay bars are the closest thing to church that we’ve got. They’re sacred spaces. Our rights were birthed in a gay bar. Every single other bar you see that’s not a gay bar, is a straight bar. Can the straights not find a bar of their own?”
Another wrote, “If you have a gay friend who brings you in that’s fine but don’t just show up with your girl squad at a gay bar because you can. It’s a safe space but it’s OUR safe space first. And if you do go to a gay bar LEAVE YOUR HOMOPHOBIC BOYFRIEND AT HOME.”
“Above all there should never EVER be hen’s parties allowed in a gay venue. (Unless it is a lesbian hen’s party of course).” stressed another.
‘Hardcore Sex In The Middle Of The Bar’?
One person even posted a theory that it is part of the natural life cycle of a gay bar.
They explained, “I heard this interesting theory of a guy who works at a gay bar. He said gay bars have a natural cycle: first it’s a gay bar; then straight women go there to have fun without the inappropriate attention; then straight males come for the straight females; then gay people leave, straight women get inappropriate attention again (so leave), straight men leave too (no females); it becomes a gay bar again and the cycle starts again lol”
One person shared an interesting solution writing, “Gay bars are meant to be our safe spaces. If they keep invading our spaces like this maybe we should just start having hardcore sex in the middle of the bar to scare them away.”
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I’m surprised that people who have had to face segregation their whole lives, and who have fought hard to overcome it, think that more segregation is the answer to anything.
Yeah…..you have to question if even some of the gay bars are even “gay” since there are so many “allies”.
It’s true – the nature of the crowd dictates the environment. Gay men want to be with other gay men. Sure we have the LGBT…blah blah alphabet family but each group do want their own spaces. Can you imagine of a bunch a straight men, even gays, turned up at Lesbian night? It changes the dynamics.
Thank god for the Laird in Melbourne.
Actually, when you think about it, women can have them. My partner and I will never be back to one.
I have too many memories of someone slipping something in my drink in gay bars to remember them fondly. Actually when you think about it I don’t remember much about those nights at all. Gay bars are not now, and have never been, safe spaces for young gay men.
How would someone know if someone else is “straight”…or gay…or bi+?