For members of the LGBTQI community such as cisgendered lesbian, gay and bisexual people, dedicated dating applications such as Her, Grindr and Taimi have been available for some time.
On these applications there are options to select your gender as trans. However, things that what if you are trans but neither gay or lesbian, what are the options that are out there for you?
Luckily a new dating application has been designed and is now up and running in Australia, Belgium, Canada, Cyprus, Denmark, Finland, France, Germany, Greece, Hungary, Iceland, India, Ireland, Israel, Italy, Luxembourg, Netherlands, New Zealand, Norway, Poland, Portugal, Spain, Sweden, Switzerland, Turkey, United Kingdom and United States.
Butterfly Transgender has been designed as a ‘no barrier to communication’ dating application, which is also in a website format, allowing you to choose if you want photos on your profile or not. The one click ‘ FLUTTER’ button – which makes starting a conversation quick and easy, blocking a member is also a single button press – which makes you invisible to the other person and no further contact can be made.
The app has a ratio of genders – 34% transgender : 43% cisgender male : 23% cisgender female – and it is open to transgender, males and females – additionally, any sexuality, users are free to define their identity how it best suits them.
Star Observer spoke with members from the trans and gender diverse community to find out what experiences they have had with other dating applications and why a new application is necessary.
Belinda Zipper who is a trans woman says that it is hard dating as a trans woman as it creates complications around men who are interested in trans women as sexual objects, acknowledging this happens to cis females also but there is a lack of relationships and more random sexual encounters.
She continues with, “I’m interested in women, the ‘pool’ of interest is much slimmer. That is, if I was into guys, I could easily date a different one each week. But there are fewer women into trans women. I’m not complaining about this: it’s just the way it is. If a woman doesn’t want to date a trans women, that’s their choice.
“I’ve tried a couple dating sites specifically for trans people, and the sleaziness there is the worst. I was so put off by the disgusting approaches that I gave up.
“Sometimes I think it would be nice to settle with another transgender woman. There is a level of mutual understanding that need not be spoken.”
Geneviève Doyle who is a trans woman says that it is hard dating on apps, as they do not allow someone to indicate that you are trans or that they are post gender reassignment surgery, meaning that you have to put it in a public forum in the ‘about me’ section, which takes away from the real identity of who you are.
She follows with, “Yet if you don’t…. men will be weird/funny/dangerous with you. I have had men engage in extended conversation, ask me for a date on my appearance, then bail when they find out I’m a post-op trans woman. So I’m anatomically correct, but still rejected.
“On lesbian apps, like Her, what I typically get is again…. fall in love with my looks and then reject me because I’m trans… except they just never reply back.
“A very small number will appreciate me for who I am.”
It seems that even if there are options to select if you are trans or gender diverse it can put you at risk and may even find yourself caught up in a game of cat and mouse with a chaser.
A chaser is a term that is used to refer to a person who is only sexually interested in a person because they are transgender.
If you were sought after on a dating site because of your identity, how would you feel?