Cyber-bullying: a social epidemic

Cyber-bullying: a social epidemic

The biggest decision some of us may have faced over the long weekend might have been which dance party to attend or which footy team to back. But for many, the stakes were higher.

For many, every day is a living hell — and it may be their last.

Off the back of Stephanie Rice’s appalling Twitter gaffe, rapper and former felon 50 Cent tweeted: “If you a man over 25 and you don’t eat pussy just kill yourself damn it. The world will be a better place.”

Ellen DeGeneres, however, has publicly appealed for the homophobia to stop, before any more lives are lost in a heartbreaking string of suicides triggered by schoolyard and cyber-bullying.

I’ve spoken about this before. But it can’t be said enough. World Suicide Prevention Day passed recently. Most were too absorbed in the upcoming long weekend or Commonwealth Games to notice.

The Greens have vowed to help. The Gillard Government made a pre-election pledge of more than $22 million to tackle suicide in at-risk groups. Let’s hold them to that. RIP Mandy Rollins.

When I learned that an old friend had committed suicide, it wasn’t a shock. He’d been tormented at school. I sometimes wonder if there was something I could have done. But the signs aren’t always so obvious.

It may be hard to fathom the depths people sink to in their grapple with depression, but if you suspect someone is suicidal, please do something. Anything. You could save a life.

According to Suicide Prevention Australia (SPA), 65,000 Australians attempt suicide each year. Suicide is the leading cause of death for GLBTI youth. With statistics as sobering as this, surely we need more aggressive suicide and bullying prevention campaigns.

Why are we letting our gay, lesbian and gender diverse youth die?

If you’re doing it tough, know that things will get better. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Yes, you might be different. But what’s ‘normal’ anyway? Your diversity is awesome.

50 Cent’s comments are reckless and uncool. Anyone suggesting otherwise is part of the problem. You are not alone. There’s a community of like-minded people with open hearts and minds. Remember that without the rain, there’d be no flowers.

At the very least, give yourself a chance to bloom.

info: If you’re contemplating suicide, contact Lifeline’s 24-hour service on 13 11 14.

The Gay and Lesbian Counselling Service can be reached on 8594 9596. Young GLBTI people can also contact Twenty10 for assistance on 1800 65 2010.

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11 responses to “Cyber-bullying: a social epidemic”

  1. Asquith thanks for posting, I just caught up with it. You are right. My problem Bec – I see gay men of all ages lives destroyed by the slander of others. This must be addressed not just all this Stephanie Rice/50 Cent/Vince Vaughen use of a few words that everyone gets annoyed at, yet ignore when someone in the gay community suicides because they are called a molester or something. Cyberbulling on one site for gay men is so bad to the point where I have seen them physically fighting just like school kids do. All I am saying is this, address homopobia but also address and recognise it is a same sex thing not just what comes from the outside world.

  2. Sorry Bec, I would’ve let this go but your comment regarding a “massive generalisation” based on my own experience is VERY incorrect.

    I have been involved in a 4 week research activity where I spoke to people on the scene to hear their views and opinions of the community and I have to say it aint a pretty picture and for your information the interviews I did where within ALL age groups and nationalities.

    Yes, there was talk about the positive things the community and people have done but the majority of opinions where negative, I too have had several positive experiences within our community – there are people out there that should be saints for all the work they have done!

    Sorry Damien but I had to really point this out!

  3. Why do you assume my attitude is that bulling is only a straight/gay thing Michael? I have not said that. I agree with addressing the internal as well, as I have said above. Also…. what is this “tar the heterosexual community” nonsense? Who are these Sydney based activists “hijacking” the “agenda” Michael? Actually…. what is your problem?

  4. Bec it is important to address both the internal and the external, attitudes like yours, that bullying is just a straight/gay thing only, suggest ignoring what is going on in the GLBT community and again tar the hetrosexual community as all against ‘us’. It is a problem in and out of the community and like gay marriage I don’t want mostly Sydney based activists, who try to control the agenda for the rest of us in other parts of the country, hijacking this and ignoring the suicides and hurt caused between those in our own community to others.

  5. Well if South Park touches on it, it MUST be true.

    I also agree we have some internalised issues to work out, however, why lose focus addressing homophobic bulling as a result? Whilst there may be some ‘in fighting’ in our community, I fail to see how this justifies ignoring the increasing LGBTI youth suicides being created by bullying.

    To say the majority of gay people are not nice is a massive generalisation, a pessimistic message for young LGBTI folk and possibly more a reflection of your own experience than anything else. There! now I’ve said it too.

  6. I agree with Paul 100%.

    The majority of gay people are not nice, we seem to always have this element of competition on who can be the biggest nasty bitch and this is with gay people socially and those that are in power in our workplaces and community organisations. Also, just look at how we separate ourselves from one another with terms such as gams, twinks, bears, pigs etc we are not about unity at all.

    Yes those “gay categories” may seem old fashioned to allot of you but we still segregate from each other, most gay events are only marketed towards specific groups only and don’t think the bigotry is only from the young gay people (as MOST people always say) older gays can be just as bad if not worse, I’m young and have been to allot of “Bear” events and parties for the leather crowd and have always had men sneer snide comments of “what are you doing here” etc etc.

    There! I said it.

  7. Gay people are one of the most racist and bigoted groups out there, Even South park touch on this with “Mr Garrison”
    i have seen & heard the most shittiest behaivour from gay people when it comes to people down, so fix ourselves first!

    Kind Regards
    Paul

  8. Of course 50 cents comments were homophobic. Celebrities need to be held more accountable for their actions and irresponsible words. It is not only the young and the gay experiencing cyber bullying at the moment Michael. There are teenage girls killing themselves after being bullied about their looks or their weight or their eye colour. Bullying is not new and the internet merely brings it into homes or onto teenager’s phones.

    I agree about certain dating sites creating an internalised bullying system, however I think this article speaks to the bigger picture and has some very positive comments for LBGTI youth (which is lacking in the majority of lesbian, gay, trans, and bi press)

    Thanks to the star observer and the column writer.

  9. I agree we need to take more serious action when it comes to bullying although I do not know if I agree 50 Cents comment was homophobic. Dumb yes however are we giving him to much credit for having the brains to think it through…???

  10. The problem with this is what is being addressed and assumed in cyberbullying is that it is hetrosexuals bullying gay, lesbian, bi and trans. No, no no. This is the fallacy. Ellen was wonderful and you are spot on with the fact that words are powerful. However, if you want to see cyberbullying and discrimination in action, the chat lines of a certain well known gay meeting site are abundant with backstabbing, hurtful comments, threats of violence between gay men, lost friendships, harrassement and disclosure of HIV status.

    I urge everyone to broaden their understanding of cyberbullying and suicide because as the internet grows in users, it will not just be the young and the gay that will experience it. Gay and lesbian online bullying of each other is some sort of get over it silent epidemic, yet I know several who have been bullied to the point of nervous breakdowns.

    You can’t bloom when your own community bullies it’s own community. It won’t stop but not all of us can harden up princess.