G is for:

Gloria Jean’s A whack of caffeine, a handful of disgruntled community members and a multinational under fire were the ingredients in what has probably been the most explosive Sydney Star Observer story all year.

The October ruckus pitted the Darlinghurst branch of coffee retailer Gloria Jean’s against a couple of wronged activists, who accused the caffeine merchants of running a side trade in prejudice by supporting the anti-gay Mercy Ministries. A couple of weeks earlier, Gloria Jean’s shops across the country had held a fundraiser for Mercy, which helps young women in crisis and has the support of the Hillsong Church. The ever-earnest activists urged the community to stop sipping at Gloria Jean’s, claiming Mercy Ministries supported ex-gay programs.

Quicker than you could say skinny soy latte with one, Gloria Jean’s hit back, touting its gay credentials to all that would listen and giving a rainbow flag pride of place in-store. Mercy Ministries also went on the defensive, saying it had no ex-gay programs and was not run by Hillsong. The controversy might have deterred a few dedicated Gloria Jean’s drinkers, but it soon descended into farce, thanks to scores of increasingly hysterical postings on the Star‘s website. Did someone say storm in a coffee cup?

Gonorrhoea It’s so hot right now. All the gays are getting it. But as popular as gono is -“ a recent survey of 1,400 Sydney gay men found one in 10 had it -“ it’s a real bitch of an STI. Apart from the gross discharge this bacterial infection can cause, not to mention the serious damage it can do if left untreated, when gono is diagnosed you’re supposed to contact all your previous shags to tell them they might have it, which is humiliating to say the least.

Gono is usually found in the penis, anus or throat and is transmitted via anal sex, oral sex and digital penetration of the anus (arse play). Often people don’t show any symptoms and have no idea they’ve got it, which is why experts say regular STI testing is so important. Once found gono is easily cured with an injection of antibiotics in the bum.

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