Royal wedding a bitter reminder

Royal wedding a bitter reminder

Between one and three billion people worldwide watched the royal wedding last Friday, it is estimated.

While I only tuned in long enough to check out Kate’s frock (thought it was nice but a little conservative), the whole wedding affair was a bitter reminder that I still can’t marry my princess.

The royal wedding demonstrated that while marriage is arguably the most globally recognised form of relationship recognition, it is much more than that.

Reports of straight men shedding tears while watching the nuptials in their local pub is strong evidence that marriage has an incredible symbolic value, beyond the strict legal context.

It’s understood by the couple and their guests to be the greatest commitment that one person can make to another person — a lifelong promise to love one another.

Those who oppose making marriage available to all couples argue that to allow same-sex and gender diverse couples to marry would somehow subvert the purpose or dilute the validity of the institution of marriage.

While much opposition to full marriage equality is grounded in religious beliefs, 63 percent of couples who married in 2007 had a civil ceremony conducted by a wedding celebrant rather than a religious minister. In fact, the legal requirements and process for getting married in Australia have been long determined by secular laws, which ought to govern us all without discrimination.

Other opponents argue that the purpose of marriage is procreation and since same-sex couples are unable to procreate ‘naturally’, they shouldn’t be allowed to marry. This is obviously a ridiculous argument, as many opposite-sex couples are unable to procreate ‘naturally’ either.

These arguments are reminiscent of arguments made by opponents to interracial marriages, says US law professor Kim Forde-Mazrui.

“If religious, scientific, moral opposition to interracial relationships — sex, marriage, and adoption — were wrong, notwithstanding the sincerity and good faith of those who believed in the opposition, then are the same arguments any more justified when they are used to oppose same-sex relationships?” Forde-Mazrui asked at a talk sponsored by the Center for the Study of Race and Law and the Lambda Law Alliance in 2004.

I long for the day when we have marriage equality free from stigma and prejudice. I will then hopefully have the pleasure of critiquing the wedding attire of two princesses.

Kellie McDonald is co-convenor of the NSW Gay and Lesbian Rights Lobby.

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6 responses to “Royal wedding a bitter reminder”

  1. Rob: Again as in your previous response to me your comments are invalid.

    1) I am NOT conveniently ignoring the negatives of the heterosexual community – Please re read my post to aid your anxiety.

    2)I am not arguing the point of gay people spending their times in bars and clubs – this is YOUR point of argument NOT mine.

    David: Why do we need to “prove” if gay people are successful in their relationships by legalising gay marriage? Can’t we do that already? Gay people are going in and out of relationships at the moment are they not?

  2. There’s only one way to prove if Banks is right. Let the gays get married and we shall all observe. I’m up for it! :)

  3. Until gays are allowed to get married in Westminster Abbey to the tune of $60 million, there will not be full equality! Anyone?

  4. @Banks .. just a bit of self loathing going on there?

    There is more to gays and lesbians than the clubs and bars – I know two couples who have been together for 18 and 23 years respectively, another that has just had their 13th anniversary, and my ex who has now been with his current partner for 11 years (and yes, we are still friends).

    Too many people, such as yourself, focus on the negatives of being homosexual; but conveniently ignore the similar negatives that exist within the “straight” community (unless you seriously think heterosexuals out on the nightclub scene aren’t promiscuous that is).

    If you are going to compare heterosexual and homosexual relationships and lifestyles then you need to compare apples with apples.

    Sure, there are many homsoexuals who “live” on the club scene and have promiscuous lives; but just as equally there are many heterosexuals who do the same (and not all of them single).

    But there are also many same-sex couples who live “out of the limelight”; and they should be provided the opportunity to get married if they want to.

    If you are going to argue against same-sex marriage because “some poofs are promiscuous”, then you should be equally arguing against heterosexual marriage on the same grounds.

  5. I am gay. I don’t support gay marriage or gay parenting as I believe the majority of gay and lesbian people are too emotionally insecure, self absorbed, socially in adequate and emotionally desensitized – These are not healthy attributes for bringing up children and legalising relationships. As mentioned in a previous post I am not solemnly going by my own experience with gay people and the community.

    We already live in a world where the straight people have done it wrong. Divorce is almost as common as eating apples. Single parenting is through the roof. Poor parenting skills is VERY common now etc etc – we don’t need gay people to make things worse.

    I get really surprised with this whole “let us get married” concept when in nearly every gay person I have met and spoken about relationships or gay people in general I ALWAYS hear the same negative perceptions that gay people are promiscuous, lesbians are all aggressive, gays are too much all about looks, gay relationships only last for several months, gays hate Asians and anyone who isn’t white and muscly and the list just goes on and on now I’m sure you who is reading this can really relate to what I’m saying.

    Whenever I read about gays for marriage freedom etc I always think to myself “Who are you” and “Are you being realistic”…