Hilariously sardonic queer comedian Hannah Gadsby heads to the Sydney Comedy Festival in May with The Cliff Young Shuffle, the painfully funny true tale about her decision to travel from one side of England to the other on foot — some 300km. While also weaning herself off an eight-year dependence on anti-depressants. While that might sound like one big long list of travel don’ts, Gadbsy wants you, dear Sydney Star Observer reader, to learn from her mistakes. In that spirit, she’s offered up her top five travel do’s and don’ts.

– Make sure you know what side of the road traffic will be speedily approaching your soft, vulnerable, breakable body.
– Pack all medication. Sudden withdrawals will result in bad decision-making.
– Tell people about your travel plans. But make sure they have a care factor. Strangers often lose interest when trouble strikes.
– Try and remember what city you are in. It makes reading maps and asking for directions significantly easier.
– Assume that you will keep in touch with everyone you meet. You won’t. But it’s a nice thought.

– If you have gastro, don’t book into the first hotel you find near the bus station in Saigon. It may be a brothel.
– Don’t stare at unusually large people in America. The novelty will wear off.
– Don’t ignore concussion.
– Don’t let your sister book you on to a Trafalgar tour of Europe when you are 19. Visiting 52 countries in 11 days with a busload of middle-aged and elderly Australians is not young fun.
– Don’t get a massage in a foreign country if you are not fond of them generally.  It’s not better. Especially not with a full bladder and a language barrier.

info: Hannah Gadbsy performs at the Yalumba Wine Bar from May 4-8. Visit www.sydneycomedyfest.com.au

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