The men you need to watch out for

by KLINTON PORTER

It has been identified that there is a problem happening in bars. Nice people have been catching something that they are unaware of. Don’t be alarmed as they only attach themselves to certain types of people. Symptoms will only appear in about two as that’s how long it takes for signs to appear. Depending on the case will depend on what cure or symptoms that you need to take.

So to help combat this problem I have made a list of the ten most common men to watch out for.

The Married Guy: Secretly not single

The most common and the most deadly. They are very hard to spot and blend in with their surroundings. Symptoms are reflecting any questions about them back to you. Not going into details about their lives. Very aloof and not being able to be reached when needed.

The only cure known to man is to get rid of them as soon as possible. Cut contact as soon as you know as no matter how hard you try, they will never leave their relationships for you.

The Hogger: Keeps you from your friends

This is the paranoia man. The one who has a lot of questions as apposed to the married guy with none. They are the serial daters. They want to know where you’ve been and with whom. They want to spend all their time with you and when you don’t he gets very defensive and lay the guilt on.

To help combat the hogger, reassure him by taking him out with your friends to ease his mind. Remind him time apart is healthy. Otherwise you have to heave ho the hogger.

The Spender: Buys your love to keep you

The spender has a fear of losing you so he showers you with gifts. It may start with a bottle of wine on the first date. Then may be movies and dinner on the second. But after a week your bank balance hasn’t moved and yet your wardrobe is full of the latest styles.

You cannot be bought nor buy someone’s love. Tell them to allow you to pay for things once in a while as balance is important to staying a couple. Otherwise ask them to be returned. Keeping the gifts is up to you.

The freshman: Newly out gay guy

You are attracted to their eagerness and excitement. They’re brand new and never been used. They haven’t been tainted with cynicism by the scene yet and this can be quite refreshing.

Just like a butterfly, you capture, admire, play with and then set them free. They won’t want to settle down so soon and it’s not fair to ask them too. They have to learn and to be given the chance to be cynical and tainted just like the rest of us.

The Handbag: the Incredibly Vain

They don’t want a commitment, just a person to hang off their arm, look good and hold things for them. In the dictionary this is the definition of a handbag. It’s a boost to your confidence that someone thinks you’re hot enough to be their handbag. Plus some perks may come of it such as being taken to events.

But only be an accessory once or twice then send yourself back to the store. Shallow people, a good husband does not make. If they don’t want your brain, you don’t want them.

The Liar: Extending the Truth

Straightforward symptoms. The stories they tell blend from truth to fiction constantly. Bending truth or omitting parts of their story is their speciality. Honesty is the best policy. Liars always get found out and it’s frustrating when you think you’re dating a medical student and they turn out to be a chemist delivery guy.

Lies usually stem from a lack of confidence. Boost theirs by making a fuss over the real stories. If your ears keeping bleeding from fiction let them and their tales go.

The Gossiper: The Social butterfly

Common sign that you have caught a gossiping butterfly is while walking down the street random strangers know who you are, where you went for dinner last night and what moves you tried out in bed. If your date gets described by his friends as being able to talk under water, then you have got yourself a gossiper.

True it’s good to fill silence and never being lost for a word is a skill. But butterflies don’t know when to stop, nor do they know what should be kept private.

Tell them to keep a lid on it or you will have to swat them.

The Life sucker: The Negative Guy

He’s the guy that when you first meet will be complaining about the drinks being to expensive, them music’s too loud, it’s too crowded or he’s tried. Find faults in almost everything may be a turn on to some but to most the whole half empty attitude is quite a downer. Surrounding yourself with a negative guy will rub off on you.

This is a bad thing. So if you hear more complaints than compliments, thrown the half empty glass over his head and leave.

History Repeating: Living in the Past guy

This is the guy ready for a new relationship. Anew relationship exactly like his old one. Reminiscing on dates and comparing time with you to their exs is not the ingredients for fireworks. It’s not right or fair on you. Not to mention their mental health.

Looking back so much not only will give them neck spasm but also will poison you’re future together. Tell them to keep the exs name to a minimum, start afresh with you, otherwise the next part of their past will be you.

The White Knight: Mister Perfect

The hardest one to catch as symptoms can vary from person to person. Sadly you may need to go through all other nine before finding this one.

There is no known cure, nor do we want one. The White Knight also goes under prince Charming, Mister Wonderful and Future husband. Keep your eyes open for this one.

Please remember, if you do catch one of these at a bar or any places please be cautious. Any of these are hard to spot and may cause annoyance, inconvenience, and bad dating.

If symptoms persist please see your doctor!