GREY MATTERS: Venturing Out

Venturing Out is the October edition from our fabulous monthly Grey Matters column, by Peter Benn.

We older gay men venture out of our homes for: 

1) necessities like food and medical visits

2) to attend events

and 3) to socialise with like-minded friends and acquaintances — the latter being good for our mental health.

Melbourne has its Boiler Society, Sydney its Mature Age Gays, and Brisbane its Mature Age Men. 

Now, the Victorian Pride Centre is endeavouring to establish a new social group for older gay men in Melbourne, highlighting both friendship and activities. 

As we age, many of us have become more reclusive and consequently more isolated, partly due to reduced income streams, the overwhelming amount of performance now streamed into our homes, or simply the effort required to attend events. 

Recently, a friend invited me to a Q&A with Perth-based author Holden Sheppard late on a Sunday afternoon. “Sure”, I said, knowing nothing of the event or the man (under what rock had I been hiding – he wrote Invisible Boys). Over 50 enthusiastic gay attendees, including some casual acquaintances, were there.

What lessons did I learn from this event?  Firstly, it took a friend to instigate the idea, and secondly, additional encouragement for me to ‘take a chance’.   

But it was a totally positive result. It was great to share an event with friends and to share a meal together afterwards. I learned that I wasn’t the only enthusiastic gay literary hound. I became more aware of other gay events at the Pride Centre and elsewhere. 

I felt good about supporting my wider gay Arts community. It opened up further reading and viewing into my home life. 

Question is: Do I want to just attend and watch something, or do I want to interact in a more social way with my community? That answer from scores of men will decide whether or not a new social group for older gay men will succeed or not. 

What would it take to get you to attend? Drag bingo, hotel lunches, line-dancing, an enthusiastic friend?