Brisbane gay couple look to crowdfund access to IVF in Australian first

Brisbane gay couple look to crowdfund access to IVF in Australian first
Image: Chris and Todd Kinsey-Manning have begun a crowdfunding campaign to help them gain access to IVF. (Supplied photo)

IN what is believed to be the first of its kind for Australia, a Brisbane gay couple have started a crowdfunding campaign to help cover the costs involved in accessing IVF.

With the aim of raising $8000 in their My Cause campaign, their story can contribute to the wider debate over same-sex parenting and marriage equality.

After meeting when work took him from Melbourne to Brisbane, Christopher Kinsey-Manning quickly took to building a life with his partner and now soon-to-be husband, Todd.

“We’ve both grown since we met each other, gotten better lifestyles, both been promoted to better positions and more established careers and we realised about two years ago that we had so much in life that was making it amazing,” Kinsey-Manning told the Star Observer.

“But we also felt like something really important was missing in our lives: a real family to call our own. From that moment, the biggest challenge began.”

The pair originally sought other methods to start a family but plans with a few surrogates didn’t eventuate, directing their attention to other means.

“I started learning about the steps and costs that were involved in having a child semi-naturally (the turkey baster method) and unfortunately we had a few possible pregnancy journeys fall through at the last minute, so we decided that if it would definitely help us begin our family, we would go through IVF,” Kinsey-Manning said.

Access to IVF can start from around $10,000 and the complete process from start to end, barring any complications, comes in at around $25,000.

“[The costs] certainly made us think about the entire process and also reinforced how much we are willing to sacrifice to eventually hold the last piece of the puzzle in our arms,” Kinsey-Manning said.

“We know we can afford it, but it’s just such a huge outlay for us to begin a family which is really frustrating to know considering how easy it is for any other regular couple (or even lesbian couple) to achieve whilst we have to put so much in to just to have a possibility.”

Following some advice from a friend, the pair decided to launch a crowdfunding campaign knowing full well that some may question their right to ask for donations to access IVF.

“Being as blunt and honest as I can, I don’t believe we deserve money any more than someone that is doing it tough out there and needs some help,” Kinsey-Manning said.

“The genuine reason why I am willing to put myself out there in this way is simply because if it can help me and my husband bring a (guaranteed to be) unique and happy soul in to this world to become part of a stupidly loving and energetic family, I believe that every dollar is going to paid forward in the future in an amazing way.”

With rights of same-sex couples to raise children being dragged into the wider marriage equality debate by opponents, Kinsey-Manning hopes critics will eventually understand the most important factor that lies at the core of parenting: love.

“If two people have genuine love and happiness together there shouldn’t be anything or anyone that has the right to say that becoming a family ‘isn’t natural’ or ‘isn’t fair on the child’.

“I am a multiple-generation Australian and Todd is a born New Zealander, and whilst we can’t be legally recognised as it in Australia, we consider ourselves as a genuinely married couple.

“[Altruistic and commercial surrogacy] is a long and arduous process, and it has cost each of them a hell of a lot, but becoming a parent means so much to so many couples out there, especially in the gay world, that if it is their only option they are going to break any and all boundaries needed to just so they can achieve the creation of a little unit of their own.”

With or without a successful crowdfunding campaign, the pair will continue to pursue IVF treatment.

“We are 100 per cent prepared to go through this challenge of life without relying on the help of anyone else…. we are doing this for the right reasons and plan on showing the world that two dads can bring up one amazing child,” Kinsey-Manning said.

“Unfortunately to get there we have to take this route, and it’s certainly not a cheap road to have to follow.”

To read more about Chris and Todd’s story and to make a donation, click here

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6 responses to “Brisbane gay couple look to crowdfund access to IVF in Australian first”

  1. “We are 100 per cent prepared to go through this challenge of life without relying on the help of anyone else….”

    Ah, what about the woman who is going to have to carry and give birth to the baby? Reality check people.

  2. I love that Todd and Chris are trying to start a family. Why shouldn’t they ask for help. There are people out there asking for help for something everyday be it for Plastic surgery, family, IVF ect. Who care they are giving it a shot. Plus you don’t have to help if you don’t want to but im sure if you were in the same position as them and you did what they are doing you would like the help like they said
    ”We know we can afford it, but it’s just such a huge outlay for us to begin a family which is really frustrating to know considering how easy it is for any other regular couple (or even lesbian couple) to achieve whilst we have to put so much in to just to have a possibility.”
    Love you both

  3. My son Riley is only 16 yet he came out to me as bisexual (and then gay) three years ago.
    He may have a boyfriend rather than a girlfriend, but he is as true-blue manly as any of the other boys in his grade and he isn’t afraid to admit who he likes.

    The crazy things is that when he saw this story he sent me the link through Facebook straight away, and we ended up sitting down soon after and had a long one on one talk.

    These 2 boys have really struck an strong note with Riley – so much that he wanted to make sure that I know that I’m going to be “that crazy nanna” when becomes a dad with his husband one day too.

    The world is changing more and more every day with people like Chris and Todd having the guts to stand up for what they know is right, and thanks to that I think it’s is a pretty amazing thing that my son can even come up to his mum at 16 years old and tell me that without having a fear or regret in the world.

  4. I believe you are missing the point here…
    They even stated that they do not need donations to be able to afford becoming parents and are willing to do whatever it takes.

    Bringing down a couple of guys simply because they had the guts to do whatever it took to become parents and then being willing to admit that a difficult road like that is a little bit of a challenge for anyone to afford at first is more pig headed than fair.

    This story shows that just because guys are born gay doesn’t mean they can’t go on to build the same amazing homes and family that any other couple in this world is lucky enough to be able to achieve without a problem.

  5. So you want other people to pay for your decision to have a child? If you can’t afford to have the children in the first place, you shouldn’t be asking others to help support your selfish desires.

    I’m a gay man. Sure, I’d love to have children, but at least I’m realistic about the situation I’m in and chose not to go down the path of being a parent, as I simply couldn’t provide the level of financial support I believe a child needs in this world.

    Yet another LBGTI story that makes the community look pathetic. Thanks…

    • As Chris’ former high school teacher, “pathetic” is not a word I would use to describe this strong young man. Sure, you may not agree with his decision, that’s your personal choice, but you don’t need to bring him down. I don’t think it makes the community look pathetic at all. Like all communities, the LBGTI is a very diverse one. I wouldn’t say that Elton John is representative of it anymore than I would say that Ellen is: it’s a diverse mix of people! Good luck to Chris in following his dream of having a family.