I’ve been looking at a lot of dick on the internet lately. I don’t know why -“ I’m just bored, I guess. But there are some really fantastically excellent puerile dick sites out there, so this week I thought I’d share a few of my favourites with you.
Visible Penis Line (www.vpl.bz)
A free site, VPL’s tagline is: Celebrating men who show a visible penis line! Eight galleries feature photos of men in various states of tumescence, all of whom are fully clothed. There are a few celebrities, lots of athletes in lycra unitards, and pics of average-looking dudes with above-average-looking manhoods ruining the line of their slacks. Sweet.
Donna’s World Famous Long & Short Of It! (www.metal-sludge.com/LongShort.htm)
No pics to be found here, just endless discussion of the cock sizes and sexual stamina of various heavy metal rock stars. Donna commences her dick-ography with the promise that she’ll divulge the inside line on who has what in those Leather Stage Pants, and she doesn’t disappoint.
A sample from her list, just to give you an impression of Donna’s appealingly idiosyncratic writing style:
Jon Bon Jovi. Back in the day Jon was a huge slut but he’s chilled out a little. Jon has an average size cock and like a lot of guys prefers to receive oral rather than give it. He has a good rhythm though and will even wear 2 condoms if you ask him to.
Large Penis Support (pub136.ezboard.com/blargepenissupportgroup)
Get this -“ an online forum for the discussion of issues pertaining to the trials of going through life with a big wang. Sample discussion topics: Mirrors and sex -“ do you like it?, When did U realise?, Best underwear for showing off -¦. Etcetera, etcetera, ad nauseam. Strangely compelling.
Chris Geary (www.chrisgeary.com)
You may recognise the face: Chris Geary is an English photographer and model who seems to spend his time travelling the world and photographing hot buff dudes. He was here for the Gay Games, and several galleries capture some of Sydney’s finest sunning themselves down at North Bondi. Geary seems to have a knack at persuading hot buff dudes to grab their tackle while he’s photographing them, which is always nice. He also stars in a lot of his own galleries, and seems to take a great deal of pride in his own preposterously upfront crotch, which he dresses in an endless assortment of Speedos and hotpants.
Rate Your Rod (new.rateyourrod.com/home.php)
A member’s only site (FNAR!), Rate Your Rod allows you to post a picture of your cock online so the public can vote on whether it’s any good. Companion sites enable you to rate your tat, rate your rear, rate your crack and rate your rack.
A free section of the website gives you access to pictures of the top 10 rating rods; the voting is done in real time and so the top 10 changes from time to time. Strangely enough, all the top 10 rating rods are really massive.
That’s it for this week. Happy web-browsing. I’m off to save the whales. Or something.