Letters To The Editor

NO TO MARRIAGE
Let’s cut the gay marriage crap. There is so much hysteria on the subject, let’s get a few things into perspective.

Firstly, the various religions created marriage so they own it. Sure, they’ve bulldozed governments around the globe to legislate it into law in lots of countries (sometimes even insisting it’s between a male and a female), but realistically, it’s theirs so if you believe in their religion, it’s up to you to work inside their church / mosque / synagogue / stable or whatever to change what they offer. Just like the two Jewish guys did recently in Sydney.

Secondly, there’s no point insisting governments create an equivalent because why would anyone want to demand an outdated ritual from an irrelevant theology?

If you love and care for someone there seems to be lots of ways interdependency can be covered in the likes of wills, powers of attorney, named beneficiaries in superannuation, etc (it’s just that the company you choose must honour your request, and not be able to change it at their whim -” so this bit does need government legislation in Australia at least).

For those of us who don’t buy into the afterlife / heaven / hell crap -” do you really want to break into the domain where religions, especially the Catholic Church, spread hatred through the bile coming from the mouth of their current Pope? And then insist they marry you? Get real -¦

If you want to have a commitment ceremony, throw a party with your nearest and dearest and tell them all -” where’s the problem? And why would you want a religion involved (unless you believe in point one, then re-read the option presented).

Whatever anyone does in privacy between consenting adults is nobody else’s concern -” pure and simple -” and for anyone else to heap scorn and derision on them is really tragic and unnecessarily judgmental (who or what gives them the right to judge others anyway?).

Also, maybe these big mouths do stuff in their relationships which is just as or more repulsive to others if it were known.

So, how about we get on with everyone caring and sharing with every other human being, instead of judging and spreading hatred -” maybe there would be a few less wars raging around the world if all religions preached peace, love, tolerance and consideration as their original prophets, messiahs, enlightened ones proclaimed, instead of the bigotry and hatred currently being espoused in the name of religion.

Surely my lover and I aren’t the only ones in the world who feel this way.

-” Gary

POOR PROSE
Lisa Pryor’s hipster opinions (SMH, 25.10.08) were fun, but her reference to spotting AIDS-related wasting jarred.

For New York or Sydney people with HIV and HIV-related wasting (facial lipoatrophy), being spotted is a potentially embarrassing and unpleasant experience. Wasting and its consequences are one of the most dreaded side effects of life-saving HIV medication.

Disclosure -” whether, when, how -” to employers, workmates, family or partners remains a constant issue for people with HIV and a fearful one for many. Wasting removes any control over disclosure decisions.

Thankfully, the Government is currently considering an application to make treatment for severe facial wasting available on Medicare.

So, in the meantime, can we just go back to spotting bad hair.

-” Rob Lake, CEO, Positive Life NSW

SAD WORLD
It is with great sadness that I read Gerry and Nick’s letter in this week’s SSO (942).

It is a terrible world we live in when we gay and lesbian people in the rural and regional locations of the state still cannot be open and free about our sexuality and our relationships.

I too used to try and escape Nowra to get up to Sydney for weekends out with my old friends but quickly discovered my priorities changed when I chose a life of student-hood at university. Standing around in a nightclub or pub shouting conversation with people who were sometimes on substances or drunk was demoralising. I sat back and thought about what was wrong and realised it wasn’t the scene that had changed but rather that I had changed.

While I still enjoy elements of Oxford St, namely Palms, and that’s it, as a country guy I feel I get overlooked by some of the vicious, cynical and narcissistic gay men who populate those places.

For my own sanity and self-esteem I choose to stay in the country. And, while it has its drawbacks, with very few social connections -” with those that do exist serving little purpose but providing a forum for conversation -” at least I keep my self-esteem intact.

Sadly, I feel that elements of gay culture in Sydney will never change.

-” Eric, Nowra

ON THE STREETS
I can understand there being a need to maintain some sense of order in districts of Sydney, although it’s really a shame that our society requires this of the authorities.

You’d just think that the NSW Police would be a tad smarter and realise that a lockout will most likely have more people wandering about the streets during this 6am – 9am timeframe, frustrated because no one will let them into a venue … duh.

Smarter still that this is being trialled in summer -” the three busiest party months of the calendar. Potentially more inebriated people on the streets means potentially more crowd control needed, means more police on patrol means … who pays for this?

-” Ethan, Darlinghurst

SAD DECISION
The letter from Peter Eyers and Tobin Saunders (Vanessa Wagner), Glamstand hosts 2006, 2007 and 2008, (SSO 942) as representatives of BGF is reason in itself why the management of Mardi Gras should not only take over Glamstand but ban BGF from any involvement at all in Mardi Gras next year.

This letter is extraordinarily disrespectful of Mardi Gras and is a classic case of biting the hand that feeds you.

And please Mardi Gras, if you do take over the running of Glamstand, don’t employ these sad and bitter has-beens as hosts.

-” Julian, Sydney

UNDERSTANDABLE
I can understand NMG’s position, especially after such a disastrous Sleaze Ball (the last?). For many years, MG and NMG have heavily relied upon the post-Mardi Gras Parade Party and Sleaze Ball to fund their operations and the costs of all their other events, especially the parade.

Unfortunately for NMG, the time of the big and profitable dance party is fast coming to an end. People who attend dance parties are increasingly selecting smaller parties that cater to their individual tastes in music and/or their specific subculture.

Competition is fierce -” you only have to look at how many parties ran Sleaze weekend. This leaves NMG in a difficult position when trying to secure their long-term viability.

Of course, BGF is not the first casualty in the struggle for NMG’s survival. The Iris Foundation, who ran Azure (harbour party) and gave large donations to gay and lesbian charities and causes outside of the HIV sector, was also devastated when NMG appropriated their party.

The unfortunate harsh reality for NMG is that to continue to exist, they need access to more diverse sources of income. The alternative will be dwindling funds leading to cutbacks on everything that makes Mardi Gras what it is. So from their perspective, I imagine it’s a case of sorry BGF, but NMG need that money, thanks.

BGF was founded in a time when being HIV-positive was a death sentence and the support they gave was usually time-limited. HIV is now substantially a chronic manageable disease where people on treatment should, in most cases, be able to look forward to long, reasonably healthy and productive lives.

I can see a time, very soon in the future, where specialist support services and organisations for people who are HIV-positive will no longer exist. They will be mainstreamed into other generalist services or cease to exist. After all, raising money or getting funding for people who were likely to die very soon was a much easier sell than supporting people who are predominantly well and living long, mostly healthy lives. Looked at like this, a loss of funding or donations to BGF (and other HIV charities) is not only understandable, but inevitable.

According to the most recent National Centre for HIV Epidemiology annual report, in NSW in 2007, 22 people died from AIDS while 409 people tested HIV-positive. Now people move around Australia and don’t necessarily live or die where they test positive, but using these statistics as a rough guide, last year there were 387 additional potential clients for BGF (and other charities) to support over their lifetimes and this is projected to continue to increase until a perfect prevention method (vaccine) or cure is found.

As there become more and more people wanting to access BGF (and other HIV services), BGF realistically has only a few rational choices to make. One is to limit access to support and services, so that those who are well off, or able to work are denied access. The other is to give less support per client, so that all clients can be serviced. A combination of these methods may be more desirable. BGF has already had to face this and the harsh reality is that the loss of income from Glamstand can only make this situation worse. The alternative is to use up funds faster than funds can be raised and then close the doors when it’s all gone.

Both NMG and BGF are valued organisations for our communities, but when adapt or collapse time approaches, it’s often everyone for themselves. I hope they can both adapt and work together for an outcome that ensures the survival of both.
-” Tim, Sydney